When you become parents it takes a lot of time and energy to prioritize your marriage, and care for your new baby at the same time. I am not a marriage or family expert. But I am a new mom and wife, so I have personally experienced some of the struggles you may be experiencing in your marriage.
Here are 4 problems your marriage could face and how you can solve them.
Related Post: 7 Tips For A Healthy & Successful Marriage
1. Domestic duties aren’t prioritized, but still necessary
Problem:
You can’t put your baby down without her crying most days. But the dishes and laundry are piling up, the baby needs to be fed every 2 hours, changed every hour and you some how have to figure out how to shower some where in between.
Sure, it shouldn’t matter if your house is dirty and you haven’t showered but if you are like me you can’t function when the house is a mess.
Solution:
Mom may not (most likely not) be able to do it all, so ask for help. Sure, your husband may notice and help without you asking but remember he is a new parent too. His main concern is most likely also the new baby, and taking care of mom.
Try writing a list and delegating tasks. Determine what you will do, and what your partner will do if it is different than the norm.
2. What is Sex anymore?
Problem:
There is no time for sex.
Solution:
It is going to take time, to make time. For some couples it will be weeks and for others months.
Be patient with your body, and communicate your needs with your partner.
Once you get into a routine, and baby is sleeping longer than 2 hours at a time then plan it. Ugh, I know.. plan it?! That’s right plan it, make time for it, and look forward to it.
3. No more alone time (Prioritize Your Marriage)
Problem:
There is no alone time…for now! There will be a time where your baby sleeps through the night, where your toddler needs you less, and when you might even manage a night away with your partner.
Solution:
Until then, make the most of the alone time you have.
Whether it’s watching a show together during nap time or a date night at home after baby goes to bed, or as a family, take advantage of any time you can get.
4. Goals Change, Things Change
Problem:
Everything you thought you wanted suddenly seems less important. Recognize that things can change after you have a baby. You are no longer just responsible for yourself, but another tiny human.
My entire life changed after I had my daughter. The career I thought I wanted, I no longer wanted.
Our goals as a couple changed and we realized how important and valuable our time was. We made new goals for our family, and worked towards them.
Solution:
You have to be okay with this. In the beginning and probably for the first couple of years majority of your time is revolved around your baby, and that is okay. Trust that you have chosen the right partner and that you will make the necessary changes for your family.
And if you decide that you do not want to make any big life changes, that is okay too. You will have a new normal, but again trust in yourself and your partner and work together to achieve your goals.
Prioritize Your Marriage
During those first few months as parents your relationship may not be top priority. Remember you chose your partner for better and for worse. And if you are in your “worse season” it will get easier. Hug and kiss often and snuggle that new baby that your love created.
